How To Teach Kids About The True History of Thanksgiving
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When is the most appropriate age to talk about the truth of Thanksgiving? I think it’s closer to preschool age, so 4 or 5 years old. For toddlers, the focus is on gratitude and thankfulness and exposing them to Native American heritage and culture.
But we should start thinking about how to navigate the nuances of this topic when they’re still toddlers.
Explore these topics by asking:
- What does gratitude and thankfulness mean?
- What does gratitude and thankfulness look like?
- How do we practice gratitude and thankfulness in everyday life and language?
Then lead with information celebrating and honoring the culture of Native Americans by making sure you’re honoring both the history and making it clear they’re still around today.
Around age 4 and 5 is when you can start to honor the nuances of the history of Thanksgiving.
We want to teach them there was a feast. But also teach them that this feast happened during a time when it was really hard for the Native Americans when the Europeans weren’t treating the Native Americans fairly.
Preschoolers have a good grasp of the idea of fairness. You can help them understand what is fair and what is not fair, and then help your kids understand the Europeans were not treating the Native Americans fair and nice overall.
Another important teaching tool I recommend having is a map of the world.
Put up a map of the world and of the United States in your child’s room. This will help your conversations because you can show them where Europe is and how Europeans traveled to the United States.
Then you can show them where on the east coast they landed and where they came in contact with the Native Americans who were the people already living on this land.
The other concept I like to introduce around preschool age – and especially as they get older – is the idea of storytelling.
History is about telling a story about how things were before us. It’s important to pay attention to how the story changes depending on who’s telling the story. Help your kids understand there are different perspectives of the same story.
In doing this, you’re helping them think critically about the information that they’re taking in. Ask questions like:
- Whose story is being told here?
- Do you think there might be a different side of the story? Why might that be?
Also, help your child understand for Native Americans Thanksgiving is not a holiday that is about celebration. It’s actually a somber holiday – a day of mourning, honoring ancestors, and the pain they had to go through because Europeans didn’t treat them nice or fair.
We want our children to learn the importance of being aware of our United States History – even when it’s not pleasant or easy to talk about. We want to raise children to honor different cultures and be able to understand the history of the United States (which may be different from what they learn at school).
In order to do this work, we must educate ourselves as parents about the history of this country and Native Americans because these narratives being taught to our children in school are simply a myth and perpetuating stereotypes.
Here are some books that are a nice complement to these ideas and teach the true history of Thanksgiving:
We Are Grateful: Otsaliheliga
This book has some beautiful pictures and introduces the concept of gratefulness, which is something you can focus on when your kids are younger. This book will help them understand these types of ideas and has a good introduction to Native American culture.
Fry Bread: A Native American Family Story
This one talks about the tradition of making fry bread in Native American culture, but it also expands on their overall history and culture. This is a good one and has beautiful pictures.
1621: A New Look at Thanksgiving
This is best for older kids – around age five or six. The book has wonderful pictures and accurate descriptions of history. It also has a lot of the myths that are out there about Native American culture.
For more books that teach about Native Americans and their culture, check out my Amazon store.
The Thank You Book
This is a great book to introduce the concept of gratitude, thanking those around us, and being thankful for the people we have in our life.
Thank you, Omu!
This book has absolutely beautiful illustrations and introduces the idea of gratitude. The book shares how Omu made a stew for everybody in town and she ended up with nothing left. When there’s a knock at her door and she says, “I’m sorry. I have no stew left.” But the people say, “We are here to give.”
It’s about having time with the people that we love and also having this giving spirit and reciprocating with those we love and in our community.
For more books that teach about gratitude and thankfulness, check out my Amazon store.
Also look at these other resources:
This great website breaks down the different tribes, Native land, and helps you understand what land you occupy and then help your child understand that concept as well.
Social Studies: The Truth About Thanksgiving
With these conversations, it’s not going to always feel the most comfortable.
We might not get it right the first time, but that’s okay. You’re opening this conversation up. This is not a one-and-done conversation. These are conversations you’re having throughout the year, and Thanksgiving is the time of the year when you talk about it more. So don’t put pressure on yourself to accomplish it all at once.
How do you navigate what your kids are learning at school versus what you’re teaching at home when they’re not aligned?
First, if you know your child’s teacher and school are doing certain things that are offensive, like dressing up as Native Americans, I would have a conversation with your school about why this is offensive, why your child won’t be participating, and why you don’t think it should be done.
Then have that same conversation with your child about why they’re not participating in the activity and why it’s offensive to Native Americans.
If you know the lessons they’re teaching during this week leading up to Thanksgiving are not in line – often it’s European-centered – you can have conversations with your child’s teacher about honoring all cultures and perspectives. Think about providing them with a book list of helpful children’s books that are age appropriate.
It’s okay to take a stand and advocate for your child and other children, and it’s important we honor and celebrate all cultures involved, including Native Americans.
But remember, we don’t have control over what happens, but what we can control is how we advocate and how we have these conversations in our homes.
You never know the impact you’ll have by speaking up.
Thankful for you,
Dr. Jazmine
P.S. Ever wonder what type of parent you are? Like do you tend to be more permissive, authoritarian, or do you strike a balance between love & limits (authoritative)?
Take my Parenting Style Quiz and find out! All you need is 2 minutes and an email address.
Once you complete the quiz, I’ll send you a personalized report and video with your results. You’ll receive several resources that will help you grow to create more cooperation and connection to transform your relationship with your child.
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